The only thing constant.........

.........is change.  This according to my always wise and profound father. 

I have worked in the same building, with many of the same clients and coworkers for the last 4 years.  In a few weeks I will embark on a brand new journey- new town, new environment, new clients, new coworkers.  It is terrifying.  The things that give me mental health system street cred will not be applicable in my new world.  No one will care that I know about funding streams and Medicaid, billing rates and DMH.  I will have to use my actual clinical skill and build new relationships.  I've done it before, but it's been a long time.

As if that wasn't enough, I'm also diving into a relationship and probable marriage plus stepparenting.  NG frequently talks about our family, our home, and our life together.  I don't even get time to think it's not real when he does it again!  He leaves me sweet messages on the refrigerator, written in his daughter's magnetic letters.  Somehow, it's more endearing that way.  He packed my lunch the other day, loaded a HUGE dog crate (we're dogsitting) into my trunk so I wouldn't have to struggle with it, and helped me stop worrying about a tough conversation with my boss.  Last night we discussed finances and building an addition on to his house.  Who has what debt, credit scores, financial goals and preferences, income, etc.  Now there's a conversation that will take your head out of the clouds of new love!  I'm dumb about money stuff sometimes and it is terrifying to think about for me.

It's a lot, and it's all at once.  Oddly, this is what my aforementioned always wise and profound father said was going to happen.  "It will all happen at once, honey, and you won't know what hit you."  How is it that he's still always right???  Anyway, change is good and I'm pushing ahead full steam through the fear.