In defense of stepmothers.

"Why do stepmoms kill their kids?"  A direct quote from TD the other day, in response to the highly publicized murder of 10yo Zahra Baker.  This happened not far from us so it's on the news ALL THE TIME, and the primary suspect is her stepmother, who led them to the little girl's dismembered body last week.  Its a convoluted and twisted story, and undoubtedly this little girl's 10 years were horrible and torturous.  She was a cancer survivor, amputee and deaf in one ear from the treatments, and THEN she was murdered and dismembered presumably by her stepmother.  Given that her father lived in the home and knew the child had been missing for about a month prior to anyone reporting it, dad is likely also guilty. 

The focus, however (of course), is on the stepmother.  The evil, wicked stepmother, who in this case really does look pretty evil.  This is her mug shot.
Disney perpetuates it as recently as 2008 with "Another Cinderella Story" starring Jane Lynch as the modernly evil stepmother.  She then ironically became a stepmother about 2 years later, boy karma is a bitch.  TD was watching this a few weeks ago, and we had a very pointed discussion about the differences between reality and Disney.  [In the interest of full disclosure, I will say that I hate Disney and warn all parents, particularly parents of girls, to keep them away from the Disney Channel.  It's the most ridiculous, mind-numbing, and stereotype-perpetuating programming I have ever come across.]
So here I am, defending my basic worth as a person because some nutjob killed her stepdaughter.  I assurred TD that I love her, take care of her, and that it is a rare occurrence for anyone to kill anyone, particularly a kid.  I pointed out that biological parents kill their kids also, not because I want to scare her but because I want her to learn to look at more sides than are offered to her by the media.  Shaquan Duley and Susan Smith both killed both of their boys, and they were biological mothers.  No one asked if the reason they killed them was because of their role as mothers.  No one looked at the father of the kids and asked why he chose to impregnate the crazy woman.  No one is asking Zahra Baker's dad if he killed her because he was her dad. 
TD gets it.  We talked about it for a while and she gets that crazy people come in all shapes, sizes, and roles, and that the people in her life are not crazy and love her bunches.  It was a good opportunity for us to talk about that stereotype and work through it, but I'm sure we'll have to do it again and again as long as she watches Disney.